Being mixed is more common then ever, with many people hailing from 5 or more different cultures and traditions. The blends are beautiful, creating incredible combinations of traits that are all so unique to each individual. But what lies deeper beneath the surface?
I have found, through my Native American and European mix of heritage that there is a link between myself, and the conflicts that existed between my ancestors. I could feel the turmoil, the deception, the disgust, and the pain they harbored towards each other. I felt ancient ones sitting in grief, and resentment, of the murders that had taken place by the hands of the others. The mass genocide that took place in North America happened within my bloodline, only a few generations back. I felt the shame from the European relatives, with heads hanging low, seeing now, from the other side, how their actions created ripples of pain throughout time.
“Grandmother Moon” by Debra Colburn
It was through my moon time that I could feel the swell of these dormant genetic emotions rising in my womb space. When the pain filled me up from the inside, and the tears spilled over my cheeks, was when I realized that I was the vessel of change. That this mixed blood, these mixed emotions, were mine to heal. I heard the whispers of Great Grandmothers trickle down my spine, “Forgiveness, child.”
It is through forgiveness that these wounds can heal. Through the love in my heart, and in my womb, the grief turned into forgiveness, and it traveled through the wrinkles in time to those relatives. Forgiveness for the ignorance, for the unawareness, for the deception, for the pain, for the violence and death.
I also realized, suddenly, a new perspective on the fact that I was made in love. That my mere existence was living proof of the love generated between these bloodlines, I am the genetic evidence of forgiveness.
I know I am not alone. I know that women are not the only carriers of these genetic memories and feelings. The overwhelming rush of emotion can come through any vessel. When we feel this internal turmoil, we can discover the forgiveness between our Ancestors. Each one of us that holds a unique mixture of cultures within our DNA, has an opportunity to tap in and help heal the wounds of yesterday, through simply being ourselves and emanating love and forgiveness.
As we step into the New Paradigm, there are lots of old strings and knots for us to untangle from our energetic field, and this includes our genetic code. If our DNA is a map for our origins, and there is “bad blood” between these cultures energetically, it only makes sense that part of our purpose in being born into our unique bloodline is to heal it from the inside.
Here is a poem that I wrote, reflecting these emotions from my realizations.
Ancestral Moon Moon womb waxing into fullness Feeling blood quantums swirl and twirl Within me. Epitomizing the loss of what used to be. The pain of the ancestors, The sorrow and cries of death and deception. They cry through me. Womb bleeding like the skulls from scalped relatives, Red This color inside my skin. The color that ultimately unites us, For no human has black or white blood. When will we finally see, that our skin does not define us? The healing behins in me. In this womb of internal creation, The death of life potential Flows through me. As my DNA bloodline drips down my leg, I cry from the inside. I listen to the Grandmothers who speak through my womb space… I feel the pull of their internal wisdom for they guide me with the moonlight. The spark of forgiveness has been ignited. I honor this, for freedom lies on the other side. We cannot work together when we remain divided.
The white and red skins of the past
And the blood that has shed between them All of this turmoil lies in me.
In my veins, In my womb, And through me, forgiveness flows Through my eyes And lips below.